The Gelato Chronicles

Consumption of gelato is a vice worth cultivating. Almost as good as (albeit really not comparable with) enchiladas de mole but a lot harder to prepare at home and not always—-almost never, in my experience—-easy to find outside of its original Italian habitat.

In June 2017, I had a conference in Milan, followed a few days later by another conference in Switzerland. We dedicated all the time we could in Milan to exploring sort of haphazardly but with the goal finding and trying gelaterias around the city. And we spent the few days between conferences in Florence in a similar manner. I started posting pictures of gelato on Facebook, along with the occasional commentary; and this blog post collects those pictures and comments.

22 June

Better than doughnuts.

(Note: This first post lacked detail, but I think the picture communicates some key information. Taste and smell would have been better, of course…)

25 June

This is a photo of a gelato in its natural habitat. While most gelati are relatively docile and easy to photograph, they tend to become more skittish and harder to photograph as the weather heats up.

26 June

This one was in fact carefully sculpted by the talented young artist in the background, caught by the camera as she molds another oversized creation.

June 27

This magnificent looking specimen was resting by the river when we came upon it. It bore the characteristic smooth complexion and deep coloring of the gelati known to inhabit the area, but despite the fearsome reputation it possessed a remarkably sweet disposition and, surprisingly, displayed little aggression or individuality of note. So contrary to its reputation was it, in fact, that we found ourselves wondering if it, or perhaps our critical faculties, had been impaired by the intense heat and the long hike down to the river.

June 28

We bring our hunt to a close with this young but remarkable mated pair. This were too young to have developed the particular conical adornment so common to many of the species.

July 2

I am pleased to report the discovery of several family groups of heladiensus---related to gelato, but not the same genus---in the Charles River Valley of eastern Massachusetts. This particular exemplar, a two-toned adolescent of indistinct gender, made a half-hearted effort at hiding before it was captured but, when that failed, then became quite malleable. This most recent expedition has served to reinforce the impression that gelati's North American cousins are bountiful and varied, but even the most outstanding specimens are not equal to the more impressive italic gelati.

It bears noting that there is a debate among specialists about how closely related this North American species is to the italic variety. While they clearly are not of the same species, there is a range of opinion about whether they are the same genus or merely of the same family.

Like gelato, however, these proliferate best in hot weather. Interestingly, also like gelati, their survival rates decline precipitously as the weather heats up.

July 8

Gelato forum harvardianum---invasion or distinctive local subspecies?

When I started the day today I did not expect to be confronted with a potential new species of gelato. I was busy working on ongoing research into the complex and varied world of non-dessert food groups when I chanced upon what looked like a newly established colony not far from the river. Needless to say, I could not pass by the opportunity to learn more about this apparently thriving colony nestled in among more mature, vertically integrated populations, particularly in light of the long term decline in the frozen-dessert genus along this section of the river.

Initial samples indicate that this is a viable subspecies, though of course it will be necessary to take repeated samples over time and in varying conditions to be certain. We wouldn't want to report on a new species only to have it go the way of the Guadalupe Raccoon. I will say that it is exciting to find such healthy specimens in New England---others I have seen and sampled tend to visually impressive but lacking in the necessary qualities to survive---and I hope that the apparent vigor of this particular group of gelati lasts into winter. Time will tell...

I had thought … that true gelati didn't really exist in North America---that all the so-called gelato variants here were just more-or-less successful forms of ice-cream mimesis. That's why I suspect that this new variant---Quorum Harvardianum, or perhaps Amorinum---is invasive and not native to the continent. Again, further study clearly is warranted.

(Peer commentary later indicated that this particular species is invasive, originating in northern Italy and establishing footholds at least in France and the US. My response to the peer comment: Clearly invasive then, aggressively so, but there is the possibility that it won't seriously damage local populations. Indeed, perhaps the competitive pressures will make local species stronger.)

August 13, 2018

An otherwise healthy specimen in the initial stages of heat sickness.